Wild Forests

2005-08-15 - 7:16 p.m.

Today was immensely quiet at work, which exacerbated my Monday-morning tiredness. The most exciting part of the day was seeing visible changes in the season - the sky is lighter near the horizon when my train pulls into the station now, and a few brave flowers have bloomed. They do look rather regretful to have made an appearance so early, and I'm hopefully looking forward to masses of blooms come Spring.

Bullies drive me insane. You know the type - they don't come up to you and physically push you down, like they did in primary school, but everything they do is framed that way. The way they speak to you and laugh at you, and if you complain, it's you who don't have a sense of humour, or don't get the joke. They roll their eyes, snap their fingers suddenly in front of your face to make you jump. Really, it makes me want to stab someone. At least I'd have the defence of provocation.

A lawyer at work has been an asshole to his secretary for the past week, and I've lost any little respect I had for him. I have no patience for people who take out their frustrations and impatience on everyone around them, and I have even less for those who only take it out on those who work for them. I hope never to be so worked up about something I can't refrain from heaping abuse on people.

I wrote to a friend today that I'd decided the whole point of life was to find a balance between the horrific and the wonderful parts of life. Nothing very ground breaking, I know. But I've always been at a loss of what to do when confronted with terrible news - people dying, people killing each other and themselves, taking pleasure in other people's pain, forests being felled, the world becoming more and more polluted every day. It just seems like too much sometimes, because there's very little I can do about it, and there's nothing I can do to change human nature. But I don't feel that it's a solution to turn off the TV and turn away from the newspaper. It doesn't mean it's not out there if I cover my eyes.

I think the solution, or what I would like to try as a solution, is to look at it, accept it as a horrific fact of life, do anything I can to change it, and move on to something better. Even that sounds callous, but what more can anyone do?

Witness the horror, do what you can, move on. That's my new motto for coping with the world.

previous - next


journal latest archives extras reading recipes links design contact notes email guestbook lately Time wasting - 2005-08-29 Destorying the patriarchy - 2005-08-28 Remnants of winter - 2005-08-27 Careers - 2005-08-20 Fairy floss - 2005-08-18 diaryland	2005-08-15 - 7:16 p.m. Today was immensely quiet at work, which exacerbated my Monday-morning tiredness. The most exciting part of the day was seeing visible changes in the season - the sky is lighter near the horizon when my train pulls into the station now, and a few brave flowers have bloomed. They do look rather regretful to have made an appearance so early, and I'm hopefully looking forward to masses of blooms come Spring. Bullies drive me insane. You know the type - they don't come up to you and physically push you down, like they did in primary school, but everything they do is framed that way. The way they speak to you and laugh at you, and if you complain, it's you who don't have a sense of humour, or don't get the joke. They roll their eyes, snap their fingers suddenly in front of your face to make you jump. Really, it makes me want to stab someone. At least I'd have the defence of provocation. A lawyer at work has been an asshole to his secretary for the past week, and I've lost any little respect I had for him. I have no patience for people who take out their frustrations and impatience on everyone around them, and I have even less for those who only take it out on those who work for them. I hope never to be so worked up about something I can't refrain from heaping abuse on people. I wrote to a friend today that I'd decided the whole point of life was to find a balance between the horrific and the wonderful parts of life. Nothing very ground breaking, I know. But I've always been at a loss of what to do when confronted with terrible news - people dying, people killing each other and themselves, taking pleasure in other people's pain, forests being felled, the world becoming more and more polluted every day. It just seems like too much sometimes, because there's very little I can do about it, and there's nothing I can do to change human nature. But I don't feel that it's a solution to turn off the TV and turn away from the newspaper. It doesn't mean it's not out there if I cover my eyes. I think the solution, or what I would like to try as a solution, is to look at it, accept it as a horrific fact of life, do anything I can to change it, and move on to something better. Even that sounds callous, but what more can anyone do? Witness the horror, do what you can, move on. That's my new motto for coping with the world. \| previous - next